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POLL RESULTS: Are you karma-ing?: (10 comments)

POLL: Are you karma-ing?

Friday, October 10, 2008 - 12:05 AM

A reader writes... Q: My buddy is totally promiscuous, sleeping with anybody he can. Most of these women he doesn't even care about. We're in our 20s. I tell him he's developing bad karma, but he says the women enjoy it too and that everyone is having fun. I am sort of jealous, but that's not my style. Do you see any harm in his playboy behavior?
POLL: Sleeping around at 20 is a good way to...
 
3% (51) ...get bad karma
 
67% (1120) ...get a nasty, burning rash
 
12% (200) ...make your buddy jealous
 
14% (237) ...become an excellent lover
 
2% (43) ...find that perfect someone
1651 people have voted in this poll. (This poll is not active.)
Murgatroyd
Lover

Posts: 300

Registered:
Jan 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Friday, October 10, 2008 - 01:52 AM (#45458)

Promiscuity is its own reward ... and its own punishment. The good news for your buddy is that he's getting lots of nookie. The bad news is that the women he's screwing care just as little about him as he does about them. Sooner or later he's going to want to get involved with one particular woman on a deeper level, and the odds are that she won't.

And then there's always the nasty, burning rash factor to consider ...


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Maeloch
Lover

Posts: 12

Registered:
Jan 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Friday, October 10, 2008 - 11:43 AM (#45461)

As long as he takes the proper precautions to prevent becoming a father and/or get a STD, he should be fine. Get over your jealousy, be happy with the choices you make about your own life, and let your friend live his life.

There are risks and rewards with promiscuity. The risks aren't as great as the anti-sex crowd would like you to believe, especially if you always use protection, but the risks are there.


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Bdave
Lover

Posts: 7

Registered:
Jan 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Friday, October 10, 2008 - 02:29 PM (#45465)
In Response to Maeloch (#45461):

umm actually protection isn't always 100% perfect, generally it's not a big risk but it is a risk. still it's his life to live and risk.


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dirge93
Lover

Posts: 7

Registered:
Oct 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Friday, October 10, 2008 - 02:51 PM (#45466)

Well....

Condoms don't protect from everything out there (Herpes, cancer-causing HPV, and psychotic ex-girlfriends come to mind), so his lifestyle does put him at increased risk. As well as any special someone he may want to settle down with. But he may also have all kinds of wild, wacky, no-strings attached fun and never get so much as a public louse or a neurotic phone call at three in the morning for all his fun. Fun that you're missing out on and may be more than just "sort of jealous" about.

Truthfully, I always found that any guy who'd sleep with any girl they could for the sake of sleeping with them, wasn't the most generous or considerate person to their male friends either. (and yes, the same hold true to promiscuous women, gays, and bisexuals as well. It's not a hetero-male only thing, but it is a generalization based only on my limited observations)


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Stevarooni
Lover

From: KCMO

Posts: 64

Registered:
Jun 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Friday, October 10, 2008 - 06:45 PM (#45473)

So long as he's honest about his intentions, there's not really anything wrong with what he's doing. There're all sorts of physical dangers involved here (pregnancy, stds, etc.), of course. But again, if the guy's not lying his way into women's panties, why should there be bad karma?

If you don't like what he's doing, don't do it. If he's hurting you or someone you love (and that's hurting, not just doing something you don't like), it's your business; otherwise, it's not.


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BillyName99
Lover

Posts: 6

Registered:
Apr 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Saturday, October 11, 2008 - 12:57 PM (#45479)

Hey, If he is being a gentleman about it, IE: not forcing himself on anyone, being honest about his intentions, making sure that they come first and taking the appropriate safety measures, there is no damage to his Karma.

He is not hurting anyone, or taking from anyone, so what is your problem?

If he is lying to the people he has sex with and not using protection and being an asshole, then yeah, his karma will bite him in the ass.

I will say that it is not for you to judge him. He is your friend, and you have expressed your concern. Leave it at that.


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Amanda
Lover

Posts: 30

Registered:
Oct 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Sunday, October 12, 2008 - 06:27 PM (#45497)

His lifestyle may not be your idea of good, but it's his. So back off and let him and the women be. They're adults (or at least they'd better be,) they know the possible consequences of their actions (STDs, pregnancy, hurt feelings, stalkers, etc.,) and therefore they can make their own decisions. How do you know that his behavior will result in bad karma? Karma is a force that is out of your control. Just because you feel his way of life is wrong does not mean that karma does. Maybe karma thinks it's wrong to judge, be jealous, or attempt to control others because of your judgment and jealousy by way of threats of karmic attack. If it does, you're gathering lots of bad karma yourself. And dragging others in to further judge and/or be jealous of this man? That wouldn't be good for your karma either. And, with such bad karma yourself, who are you to judge what is right? Anyway, I believe I've rambled enough for one day. Hopefully someone gained something from that. Good luck and Good bye.


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TheOriginalJes
Lover

Posts: 205

Registered:
Jan 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Monday, October 13, 2008 - 12:43 PM (#45506)

As far as, "He's not hurting anyone, so..." The real damage isn't about hurt, physical or emotional. It's about change. He's making life decisions that change the person he was to the person he is. And so do his partners.

It's his responsibility to decide who he wants to be, and how he wants to be. Until life lands on him, hard, there's nothing you can do to change him.

I do believe that the end result is that he will de-sensitize himself to most expressions of genuine affection or love. After a while, he may stop believing it exists. That is, if he hasn't already.

Whatever his past damage is, it's most likely that he's decide, sub-consciously, to look after #1. So, just keep him away from your own girlfriend, and nudge him towards protection. That's all you can really do.


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wpgDBA
Lover

Posts: 6

Registered:
Sep 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Tuesday, October 14, 2008 - 02:57 PM (#45515)

If his behaviour is bothering you, I have to wonder if this person is well-suited to be your friend.

Neither I nor my friends waited for marriage. But none of us slept with whatever walked by, either. I can count the women I slept with on one hand. I can also attach a name to each finger (even the one-night-stand).

I met several men and women that liked to brag about their "conquests." None of them would I trust. I DO have some jealousy for the idea of the lifestyle, but have never wanted to be any of the people I met in real life. In truth I usually feel sorry for them. It sounds like you fall into the same category.


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MrD3071
Lover

Posts: 7

Registered:
Oct 2008
Re: Are you karma-ing? (Score: 1)
posted Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 05:45 PM (#45555)

Each to their own, i personally dont desire a sleep about life style, and i've turned down a few offers in my time. As for the karma, seriously even if your jealous i'd worry about your Karma! Worry about their life style IF something bad comes along such as a child or a STI, and hope that can knock some sence into them, while hoping it doesnt come to that at all!

Worry more about your own Karma, and believe me Karmatic justice is a force that does exsist, ive seen it in action, and i've felt it sting, if he is gathering bad karma then prehapse it will catch up with him, and though of course its only natural to care for a friend id think more of yourself for now and dont let his ways sway your morals!


--
'Love is the light that dissolves the walls between people, countries and humanities'
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