femme, the poll doesn't say that men think "an emotional affair isn't a big deal", it just says that an emotional affair isn't worse than an a physical affair (Although 33% have said it was the same).

A little off topic, but it is well known that men associate more with physical reactions than emotional ones.

Though you did raise a good point in the fact that women do go nuts over emotional affairs (or what looks like them), so perhaps the OP should take a step back and try to get the facts straight before confronting the other womans husband.

An old saying comes to mind: When starting on the path of revenge, first dig two graves.

If you feel you can't forgive (I am not even going to get into forgetting) and you are consumed with a desire for revenge, perhaps you should look into counciling both for yourself and your marriage or the possibility of divorce.

It isn't healthy for you or the relationship to hold on to the anger, pain, and fear.

As for telling the other spouse, what exactly would you tell him? That his wife was talking to your husband? Quite frankly, unless you have pictures of them in bed or explicit love letters in her handwriting addressed by name to your husband, telling him about the "emotional affair" would sound like an older woman who is jealous of a casual friendship between her husband and a younger, prettier (just stating how it would look not that she actually is) woman.

Revenge is a very bad reason in a relationship anyway.

Is it about your relation or your female inferiority complex?

Greetings, atk

This question is hard simply because we are not privy to exactly what was said in the electronic conversation. Like others have said, there is a big difference between an emotional relationship and an emotional ROMANTIC relationship. It's also true that physical relationships can be meaningless and short-lived, while emotional ones have a greater magnitude, whether or not physicality is involved. Of course, try putting that before a judge and you won't get much out of it.

I am familiar with "emotional control," I have female friends that disgustingly exercise it. Be careful that you aren't trying to suffocate your significant other--however, if he did apologize, it probably means he knows that he was doing something wrong. (At the same time, ordering records of the phone conversation is a little creepy.)

Request that he not continue talking to her. If all he wanted was friendship with the other woman, he blew it, and that's all right. But don't put a pillow over his head emotionally.