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POLL RESULTS: Ink-stained wretch: (8 comments)

POLL: Ink-stained wretch

Friday, February 17, 2012 - 12:00 AM


I am really starting to feel left-out sexually of my relationship... first let me say that I am an attractive woman and in great shape. My husband knows that I love to have sex in the morning and that almost never happens with us. Instead of us having sex, my husband will run to the bathroom with the morning newspaper that may have an attractive young model, celebrity, etc. in it and continue to get the job done with her instead of me. He knows that I know he does this, but continues to leave me out of his desires. This is making me lose all respect for him and damaging our marriage. Any suggestions?
POLL: What should she do?
 
3% (59) Wait a while. Pretty soon there aren't going to be newspapers.
 
77% (1248) Talk to him, and tell him how his excuse for going solo is paper-thin.
 
7% (118) Get this man a subscription to Playboy for crying out loud!
 
11% (177) Fins a new guy. Preferably an illiterate.
1602 people have voted in this poll. (This poll is not active.)
rorirose
Lover

Posts: 26

Registered:
Jan 2011
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Friday, February 17, 2012 - 07:13 AM (#61070)

Are you sure that he has any respect left for you? Most guys would love to have a wife with a strong sexual appetite, and it sounds like he has a problem if he prefers to do it himself. Maybe he feels he can't perform well for you, or maybe (worse) he has lost interest in you. It's hard to say.

Either way, I'd suggest talking with him about why he's choosing the paper over the real thing and it may be prudent to seek help from a therapist. Hopefully you two can get down to the base reason for his selection without matters getting messy.


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bobb123
Lover

Posts: 7

Registered:
Feb 2012
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Friday, February 17, 2012 - 08:21 AM (#61071)

Well, from a guy's point of view, I wonder if we're hearing the whole story. It sounds as if he's taking the path of least resistance. If he has to beg for sex for an hour beforehand, or hear recriminations about how "it's all he's ever interested in", he probably is just taking care of himself because it's a lot less of a hassle. I didn't hear how the gal in the post is "doing" anything to initiate things...just saying.


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dirge93
Lover

Posts: 7

Registered:
Oct 2008
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Friday, February 17, 2012 - 08:53 AM (#61072)

Not nearly enough info to determine anything. She says she's horny, she says he's horny (or else he wouldn't be masturbating in the bathroom), she says he knows she knows he does it. And....

Does one of them try to instigate it and get rejected? Is he actually beating off to a -man- in the paper? Has she tried to join him in his "reading sessions"? What does he say when she tries to talk to him about it? Has she even tried to calmly and lovingly talk to him about their sex life?

His side of the story would make a world of difference here, and I think she needs to find out what it is.


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baquiano
Lover

Posts: 6

Registered:
Jun 2011
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Friday, February 17, 2012 - 01:17 PM (#61074)
In Response to bobb123 (#61071):

Do you have any children? Does he? Perhaps he's scared of you becoming pregnant and cannot express his thoughts lest you get upset, without knowing that this upsets you more. Ask him if that's the case or what else can make him prefer the five man salute.


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CarlosCM
Lover

Posts: 12

Registered:
Apr 2008
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Friday, February 17, 2012 - 02:59 PM (#61075)

If your husband is attracted to naked women in naughty poses, how about taking that role? Make a pose for him in the morning, if you're really horny, then masturbate and let him watch.

Let him masturbate to you without touching you.

I'm guessing your husband has some voyeristic tendencies that aren't met with regular sex. Or he might just like to masturbate once in a while, instead of having full blown, sweaty sex.

You can also try taking a picture of yourself naked in a naughty position and exchange this for the morning newspaper. Offer to him that he can see this "live". Make sure he understands you're not being passive aggressive, but want to spice up the sex life.


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Garwulf
Lover

From: In my chair

Posts: 33

Registered:
Jun 2010
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Saturday, February 18, 2012 - 08:10 AM (#61079)

Am I the only one wishing for a fifth option? I have little doubt that we are not hearing the whole story, but this sounds like a textbook case for marriage counseling. If you've got a situation like this, it stands to reason that there are far deeper issues that need to be addressed to fix it, and making demands is not going to make things better.

So, option five here, please: "Time to make an appointment with a marriage counselor."


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Murgatroyd
Lover

Posts: 300

Registered:
Jan 2008
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Saturday, February 18, 2012 - 11:39 PM (#61080)

A newspaper? Seriously? With so much soft and hard core pornography easily available, he uses a newspaper? Does he have it wrapped around a magazine?

Or perhaps the wife doesn't know what her husband is doing in there. Maybe he's just reading the newspaper in peace, away from her.

Is he actually beating off to a -man- in the paper?

Hmm ... dirge 93 brings up an interesting possibility. Which newspaper, and what pictures are in it?

Another possibility: He's having an affair, and he's depleted his precious bodily fluids with some other woman ... so he wants the wife to think that chokin' the chicken in the bathroom is the cause of his unsatisfactory output with her.


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dirge93
Lover

Posts: 7

Registered:
Oct 2008
Re: Ink-stained wretch (Score: 0)
posted Monday, February 20, 2012 - 10:15 AM (#61082)
In Response to Garwulf (#61079):

"Speak to a counselor" is up there with "speak to your partner" as advice that is obvious, but not actually going to be followed. If it were, the person wouldn't be asking strangers for the opinions in the first place.

I mean, if people actually -talked- to their partners about their fears, insecurities, desires, guilts, and so forth, sex advice columns would lose almost all of their material.


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