I see a couple of options. The best one is not to change him completely, but rather to get him to realise that baiting prudes who're likely to express their offence with a weapon is never appropriate. His flamboyant acts wouldn't be out of place in 'Bound' or a Black Rose club up in DC, or in one of your local places that serve LBGT customers; get him to lay off the theatrics everywhere else and show off only to people tolerant enough to limit their complaints to shouts of 'Get a room, you two!' instead of baseball bats or 6mm rounds from pocket pistols. Look up the history of the end of 'Jim Crow'; you're facing something similar with homophobic violence freaks in public.