"was living the obnoxious stereotype of a "flaming" homosexual, possibly as an attention-getting device or possibly because he was a little too extroverted and uninhibited for the poster's personal style."
Gee, could your overt homophobia be anymore obnoxious? Are you living the homophobic douche stereotype as an attention-getting device, or does it reflect your real character?
The question merely asks about 'flamboyant' - which you exaggerate completely and cast in a very negative way.
The reality is, your post affirms the sad point that MalikTous made - that homophobes will look for any excuse to abuse, denigrate, defame, marginalize and attack gay people.
And such homophobia is why MalikTous's advice is wrong - the flamboyant boyfriend should not and does not have to live to please homophobes, to make them comfortable . . .
Because homophobes will always see anything gay men do in the worst way, the way that feeds their heterosexist egos, anyways.
To the poster - either you really love your boyfriend, flamboyant behavior and all, or you just love having sex with him.
If you love him, you'll accept the flamboyant as part of him. If you are just using him for sex - go muck about with the "straight-acting", internalized homophobia boys on grinder and let your boyfriend find someone who truly appreciates him.